"Well, I am sorry to dissapoint you, but this bridge is quite boring" Leia said as she led the way. She grinned.

"And personally, I prefer way on <!--EZCODE ITALIC START--> this<!--EZCODE ITALIC END--> ship. Exciting means trouble, of course"

They stepped through the blast doors to the bridge, and not two steps in Leia spoke in a good natured yet mock complaining tone.

"Are we there yet Captain?"

A greying middle aged clean shaven man with his hands clasped behind his back turned to greet the newcomers. He put on a showy expression of admonishment.

"You should know the answer to that question, young lady" He responded.

"I'm not really all that young anymore, I'm afraid..." Leia said with a sigh.

"True, true" The man said thoughtfully, and then his eyes settled on Amalia.

"Ah, company?"

"Yep" Leia nodded.

The man surprised Amalia by taking her hand and bowing elegantly, kissing it.

"Ah, the lovely Amalia, I've heard much about you, it's a pleasure to have you on my..."

"...Garbage scow..." Leia cut him off.

"Heeeyyyy..." He said, and wagged a finger at her.

She cleared her throat.

"Anyways..."

Amalia remained silent as the two conversed with one another, silently observing the bridge area, as well as Leia and the Captain.

...Garbage scow?...eh, I'd be saying more than just heeeyyy to that, but that's just me. Throw her a raspberry face or something to go along with it. Perhaps I did not thwack her in the head hard enough...I'm not entirely sure of what a garbage scow is...garbage ship...I must have hit her too hard...maybe that's why he only said heeeyyy to her, he might not know what it is either...I..oh well...

She frowned a moment, over her own thoughts.

She quickly glanced from the Captain and then to Leia, her lips pressing to one side as she looked at Leia.

Well, you were right about the bridge...Did I not hit you hard enough with that piece of fruit, because I can try for a second time?..garbage scow...mmm, maybe I should recommend the fruit to the captain? I'm sure he could find a use for it, just as I did...

Leia gave Amalia a good natured mental jab in the ribs.


<!--EZCODE ITALIC START--> I have known the Captain for a long time Amalia, we have this same conversation every time I step foot on this bridge... it's just an odd little ritual... fun, and a constant.<!--EZCODE ITALIC END-->

"Reversion in 5 Sir" an officer attending a station nearby announced.

"Very well" the Captain said, and turned away from Amalia and Leia with a respectful nod so that he could go about his work. Leia meanwhile ambled over to the Command chair and dropped into it, throwing her legs up over one arm of it so that she rested in it sideways. She studied Amalia.

<!--EZCODE ITALIC START--> You think negative thoughts, have a negative air. What bothers you?<!--EZCODE ITALIC END-->

"Why?.." Amalia narrowed her eyes at Leia, raising her voice just a little as she said that one simple word. She had planned to say more but her words trailed off. Her face softened and she looked down at her feet, mumbling words that she tried not to have Leia hear, though Amalia knew she would hear them.

"What difference does it make?...Why should I...Why should I open myself to you when you let yourself closed to me..is it fair?"

She did not bother to say it aloud, she knew what Leia would say, it was just her...her nature. Though Amalia did not want to believe that, she knew better, it was just an excuse. An excuse for what exactly, Amalia did not know. She just knew that not everything had to be about Amalia all of the time. When was it Leia's turn?

It is because I'm the student, isn't it?...

<!--EZCODE ITALIC START--> No. It is because people care about you and want to hear about you.... me included.<!--EZCODE ITALIC END-->

Leia sighed.

<!--EZCODE ITALIC START--> There is little that I hide from you Amalia. I notice that when you look at me, you always are looking for weaknesses, something you can help me with, for what in your mind would be a "for once".

I was brought up to be, I was trained, I have always been, for it is my role and I like it that way, the one who gives all but takes little, attends to others but is rarely attended to herself. Your help and support to me does not come in the form in which I have given to you and you wish to return, it comes from your simply being here.<!--EZCODE ITALIC END-->

She locked gazes with Amalia, an expression of earnesty on her face.

"I can't explain it any better than that. That has always been me, and probably always be me in this known universe."

She smiled, attempting to lighten the mood.

"Hey, I was brought up as Royalty, who ever said I was easy to live with?"

Did you ever think that I might want to hear about you, Leia? Who said anything about weaknesses, I just want you to talk to me, that's all. You're too concerned with what I want, or what's wrong with me. I'm tired of that now. I'm not allowed to hear about you? Friendships are about sharing, Leia. I'm allowed to offer you, exactly what you offer me, but you won't let me. You shut me out, and that hurts, because you choose to. So don't ask me what bothers me, and then give me the same old familiar Leia speech and then expect me to carry on. That speech is an excuse, an excuse for shutting me out. I don't know why I deserve that, but for some reason you think that I do.

I shut you out, though I've given you my reasons, my real reasons. I've told them to you, but I don't know what good that will do. I want to fix that...What about you? Why can't I be what you are to me? Why can't I lend my ears to you? Why am I given the same speech time after time?

She waved a hand, as if in defeat, shaking her head.

"I'm sorry, but I just don't feel like smiling. I want to, but I can't..."

She gave Leia one last quick glance, and then turned away, beginning to make her way off the bridge, not going anywhere, but just to walk. She always ran from Leia, though she wanted to stay, very much. However, her words never did any good anymore, something that used to be her strong suit, the one thing that brought weakness to her now, and she was still afraid that Leia wouldn't understnad.

She had known Leia for many years now, but now Leia just felt like a stranger to her. Amalia didn't understand Leia, likewise with Leia toward her.

I won't give up... She thought silently to herself.

I refuse to, I've known her too long. Master and student. I'm not going to let that bond break. Nor the bond of friendship...

Her pace was very slow, her presence still in eyeshot of Leia.

Leia picked at the arm of the chair in which she sat with a long fingernail, then as if decisively, she sat up straight and turned so that she could fully face Amalia again. She found herself staring at Amalia's back.

<!--EZCODE ITALIC START--> I don't think you deserve it.<!--EZCODE ITALIC END-->

Amalia paused in her walk. Leia continued.

<!--EZCODE ITALIC START--> I think I do.<!--EZCODE ITALIC END-->

All of Leia's will suddenly was bent into an impulse towards Amalia, one which made her turn around... and look Leia in the eye again. Probably the only thing that Amalia had reacted to in that impulse was not it's command, for it lacked any command at all, but it's deeply rooted plea.

<!--EZCODE ITALIC START--> I think... I am afraid to do what you ask. Every time I do go through with giving myself to somebody else... I lose them. Forever.....<!--EZCODE ITALIC END-->

This time it was Leia who broke the eye contact, she averted her eyes to the ground...


And blinked away a tear which rebelliously formed in her eye.

I don't think you deserve it...I think I do.

She slowly turned around, a lost and confused expression settling onto her face.

What?...

She met Leia's gaze, and when she did, she became surprised, but Leia's words were what surprised her even more. At first she did not know what to say. She remained silent as she watched Leia break eye contact, the ground now catching her gaze instead. She never saw the hidden tear that fell into Leia's eye.

To live in isolation..is cause for loneliness, Leia, it brings loneliness.
No one deserves to be alone. You, me, us, we, all of us deserve to have someone there...

You can't lose what you don't have, Leia, and if you isolate yourself, you have what you really don't want...nothing.

She walked back toward Leia, slowly. Leia slowly raised her own head to look up at Amalia, though it wasn't the same closed, hard shell Leia, she knew Leia to be.

I'm not going to shut you out, Leia. You're my friend, and I yours, I stay true to the word, Leia, and all that it means. Your friendship and support means a lot to me, and I don't know where I'd be without it...

It takes trust, Leia. Trust and care.

Amalia looked down at her own hands, thinking.

..Do you remember...when you went ill? When that host of sorts, took over your body?..I gave to you what you needed, what I knew you needed, without so much as a second thought...to save your life. It took just about every ounce of my strength, but I gave it willingly...not once, but twice.

She spoke out loud this time.

"I would do it all over again, if I had to. I would risk my own life for yours. If that isn't the ultimate sacrifice of a close bond of friendship, I don't know what is."

So I say to you, I'm there, I'm always there, always will be. Don't shut me out. Your needs matter just as much as anyone else's. You need to be heard, just as much as anyone else.

Leia sighed and shifted again in her seat.

The bridge crew was finishing their countdown, and she diverted her attention to watching the turmoil of hyperspace reorganize itself into familiar pinpricks of light.

<!--EZCODE ITALIC START--> I don't just block it from you when I do that Amalia, I block it from me too. It helps me get by,<!--EZCODE ITALIC END--> she offered, though it seemed more like an admittance than a statement.

She turned to look at Amalia again.

"But I will remember..."

She nodded.

"And I shall use...."

The crew had been smartly ignoring the half vocalized and highly unfollowable conversation the two Jedi had been having, but now the Captain interrupted it to announce to Leia;

"We're here, Ma'am."

Leia merely nodded in acknowledgement, and he left them to themselves again.

"So, here we are...."

<!--EZCODE ITALIC START--> And hopefully, we will be more than just here...<!--EZCODE ITALIC END-->

Amalia rubbed at her left arm, for some odd reason, feeling a bit cold.

I don't see how, doesn't it make you sad, Leia?

She frowned, thinking about how she herself often closed herself off to others, because she was afraid of what they would all say or do, just because.

It makes me sad to know that people won't hear me, because I'm in a way, I guess, am being selfish and scared.

She pursed her lips, as if she wanted to say more but decided against it.

"So it appears so.."

We shall see...