Former Planetary Governor Yolem the Azguard, was eating his ham sandwich. In the distance, the rattling of the hyperspace engine accompanied him. He was on a very important mission:
He had found vitally important documents about their ship numbers and totals, that had been thought lost. Such information would have been devastating in the hands of the enemy.
So he munched his sandwich, onboard the Ironic, his small personal vessel, filled with a red-coat wearing crew. He enjoyed his lunch and read his documents, occasionally pausing to give the reactor afew cursory prods. Personally he was unsure if it was working right, but the shiny green glow was certainly impressive.
He returned to the document, that was very, very, very boring. Finally, he fell asleep.
*
But his Sandwich had other plans. Cautiously, it inched its' way to the document. Clamping it firmly between his slices, he popped open the window and leapt through.
You see, this sandwich knew the empire would pay a fat price for this information, and these fools would never catch him in time. Lettuce flapping, he drifted off through Hyperspace.
*
Yolem woke. The first thing his highly trained and alert mind noticed was that his sandwich was gone, then he noticed his fly was down, and then he noticed the documents were missing.
He leapt to the wall-o-com "Ensign Bob!" He shouted "Come down here now with the ships' doctor and science officer."
*
It didn't take long to make the connection: The breadcrumb trail lead directly to the open window. Science officer Bobo stuck his head out and looked behind the ship. "Its' clear" He said "That the sandwich took the documents, opened the window, and began a desperate flight through hyperspace. Isn't that right, Doctor Herman?"
"Ook*"
"Hmmm, You're right, good doctor" Said Yolem "Ensign Bob, have the bridge crew turn the ship around. We're going after him."
Now he had an even more important mission-To recapture that Sandwich before it was too late.
*
"Captain this is madness!"
"Ook!"
"I know its' dangerous, but its' the only way. We've got to get that sandwich."
Yolem knew the tolls were high around LaPoutine, a French-Canadian world outside of the Quebec System. The ship was chock-full of foreign fruits and vegetables, and they'd lost their french-english dictionary. The only way they'd get to the planet with their ship un-taxed was to use the dangerously new teleporters. He, Doctor Herman, Science officer Bobo, and ensign 2nd class Ricky would teleport to the planet and see if they could locate the sandwich.
They'd followed the bread-crumb trail as far as this, until it was obscured by a smear of damson going the other way, so they had to be quick, to catch him before he could escape into the Empire.
In the Teloport room, they stood on flood-lamps and waited for Macgreggor the Engineer to finish going through the installation system.
"Ach, what drive should we put it on, captain?"
"Well, D Drive, of course, There's much more memory there."
"Ai Knoo, boot its' a bonnie mess in there, captain, we'll never find eet again"
"I know, but C-drive takes so long to load things, it'll be inconvenient to wait."
"Well" Said Bobo "What about that new F-Drive thing?"
"Ook"
"Ach, the wee furry one has a point"
"Yes, good show there. Alright then, beam us down."
*
There was a certain amout of fizzing, but the important part was that they got to the planet alright.
The Sandwich was somewhere around the only known center of population on LaPoutine: Seperatiston. The four stealthily made their way across the fields brimming with fleurs de lys, until the city became visible.
It sat in the middle of a secluded woodland, with tall spires peeking out over the trees. "This looks safe enough" Said Captain Yolem, just before a twentyton weight landed on Ensign Ricky, squishing him flat.
Suddenly, dozens of fearsome frenchmen** leapt out from the underbrush, waving pointed sticks topped with sharpened croissents in a threatenening manner. Herman Growled deeply
"Stay calm" Warned Yolem "Frenchmen can smell fear. Just follow them and stay together."
TO BE CONTINUED
* Due to extreem budget slashing, the Doctor was replaced by an Ape. But say what you want, he's better then your average imperial doctor; He actually wants you to get better
**Oxymoron (just kidding)
He had found vitally important documents about their ship numbers and totals, that had been thought lost. Such information would have been devastating in the hands of the enemy.
So he munched his sandwich, onboard the Ironic, his small personal vessel, filled with a red-coat wearing crew. He enjoyed his lunch and read his documents, occasionally pausing to give the reactor afew cursory prods. Personally he was unsure if it was working right, but the shiny green glow was certainly impressive.
He returned to the document, that was very, very, very boring. Finally, he fell asleep.
*
But his Sandwich had other plans. Cautiously, it inched its' way to the document. Clamping it firmly between his slices, he popped open the window and leapt through.
You see, this sandwich knew the empire would pay a fat price for this information, and these fools would never catch him in time. Lettuce flapping, he drifted off through Hyperspace.
*
Yolem woke. The first thing his highly trained and alert mind noticed was that his sandwich was gone, then he noticed his fly was down, and then he noticed the documents were missing.
He leapt to the wall-o-com "Ensign Bob!" He shouted "Come down here now with the ships' doctor and science officer."
*
It didn't take long to make the connection: The breadcrumb trail lead directly to the open window. Science officer Bobo stuck his head out and looked behind the ship. "Its' clear" He said "That the sandwich took the documents, opened the window, and began a desperate flight through hyperspace. Isn't that right, Doctor Herman?"
"Ook*"
"Hmmm, You're right, good doctor" Said Yolem "Ensign Bob, have the bridge crew turn the ship around. We're going after him."
Now he had an even more important mission-To recapture that Sandwich before it was too late.
*
"Captain this is madness!"
"Ook!"
"I know its' dangerous, but its' the only way. We've got to get that sandwich."
Yolem knew the tolls were high around LaPoutine, a French-Canadian world outside of the Quebec System. The ship was chock-full of foreign fruits and vegetables, and they'd lost their french-english dictionary. The only way they'd get to the planet with their ship un-taxed was to use the dangerously new teleporters. He, Doctor Herman, Science officer Bobo, and ensign 2nd class Ricky would teleport to the planet and see if they could locate the sandwich.
They'd followed the bread-crumb trail as far as this, until it was obscured by a smear of damson going the other way, so they had to be quick, to catch him before he could escape into the Empire.
In the Teloport room, they stood on flood-lamps and waited for Macgreggor the Engineer to finish going through the installation system.
"Ach, what drive should we put it on, captain?"
"Well, D Drive, of course, There's much more memory there."
"Ai Knoo, boot its' a bonnie mess in there, captain, we'll never find eet again"
"I know, but C-drive takes so long to load things, it'll be inconvenient to wait."
"Well" Said Bobo "What about that new F-Drive thing?"
"Ook"
"Ach, the wee furry one has a point"
"Yes, good show there. Alright then, beam us down."
*
There was a certain amout of fizzing, but the important part was that they got to the planet alright.
The Sandwich was somewhere around the only known center of population on LaPoutine: Seperatiston. The four stealthily made their way across the fields brimming with fleurs de lys, until the city became visible.
It sat in the middle of a secluded woodland, with tall spires peeking out over the trees. "This looks safe enough" Said Captain Yolem, just before a twentyton weight landed on Ensign Ricky, squishing him flat.
Suddenly, dozens of fearsome frenchmen** leapt out from the underbrush, waving pointed sticks topped with sharpened croissents in a threatenening manner. Herman Growled deeply
"Stay calm" Warned Yolem "Frenchmen can smell fear. Just follow them and stay together."
TO BE CONTINUED
* Due to extreem budget slashing, the Doctor was replaced by an Ape. But say what you want, he's better then your average imperial doctor; He actually wants you to get better
**Oxymoron (just kidding)