This, this is why cast iron skillets are the best.
Posts: 7745
  • Posted On: May 30 2004 5:33am
Posts: 7745
  • Posted On: May 30 2004 5:33am
VICTORIA, BC (PRWEB) May 26, 2004 -- In an attempt to get a free meal, what was described as a "very large" bear broke into the rural homestead of a BC college student, who was home on vacation at the time. The student, who would only give his name as Ryan, says, "I had just grilled out some salmon and walked back into the dining room to eat. Just as I had just sat down, it sounded at though someone was trying to break down my door." As Ryan went to investigate, the door burst open and the gaping maw of a northern Kodiak bear appeared inside his living room. Ryan recalls, "It was the scariest moment of my life, right up there with the fishing accident in Sasketoon when I was twelve."

As the bear forced it's way into the dining room area, the beast found the grilled salmon it had smelled from what authorities estimated was over a mile away, where they found the bear's tracks around a small cave. Ryan tried shouting at the bear to get it to leave, but the bear seemed to be intent on the salmon it was feasting on.

Ryan then proceeded to throw various kitchen utensials at the bear to get it's attention. "I wasn't sure what I was going to do," he said. "After I hit the bear in the head with a wooden spoon, the bear started coming after me!" The would-be bear snack ran to the other side of the kitchen counter as the bear raised up on it's hind legs and tried swatting at him. "The bear was blocking my way to my room where I actually have a gun, so I found the only thing I had that I did not throw at him, my frying pan." he relates. "I picked up the frying pan and shouted, bring it on, bring it on!" Ryan jumped over the counter and started swinging the frying pan. The animal, estimated at six feet tall on all fours and over eight hundred pounds, got back on all fours and started to charge the young man. When the bear was about 1 foot away from him, Ryan swung the cast iron frying pan and hit the bear on the right side of its head. "The bear appeared to be dazed, so I just kept pounding him with the frying pan."

"After I hit the bear about fifteen times, the bear fell to the floor, but I dared not let up. I hit him for about another five minutes until he was not moving at all," Ryan says. Only then did he take the time to call for local law enforcement. "When the police showed up, they could not believed what they saw."

"It was the craziest thing I've ever seen," said Officer F. Barnes, of the Victoria crime scene investigation unit. "He actually killed a bear with a frying pan." The local wildlife officer showed up and took measurements of the bear, one of the largest involved in a home invasion incident in recent memory.

The bear caused about $400 dollars in damage to the house. There is no word on what became of the animal's body, but local animal rights activists are filing to take posession of the bear's remains, claiming it was an immoral act of killing, and Ryan should not be allowed to make a bearskin rug out of it. Darcy Morris, president of the local chapter of Animal Rights Abuse Watch (ARAW), says, "This young man should be prosecuted, not praised. The bear was simply following his natural instincts, and had this Ryan criminal left it alone, no harm would have been done. It's disgusting, and he can expect to hear from our lawyers." Ryan's attorney could not be reached for comment.


This guy rocks. With a frying pan, wow.

Also note the last paragraph, a very good reason to dislike animal rights organizations.
Posts: 5387
  • Posted On: May 30 2004 8:10am
Meh. I kind of agree with them. I mean if you are in a robbery, and you smack the robber with an ice cream sandwhich, and he promptly murders you, it's your own damn fault.

But if you smack his @#%$ ass and he escapes, you aren't prosecuted, since it was kinda self defense.

You can't really find either side responsible. The guy had to defend himself, but the article said that the bear only went nuts after he smacked him in the face with a spoon. If you smacked me in the face with a spoon, I'd come after you too.
Posts: 4291
  • Posted On: May 30 2004 11:27pm
I can't really tell what to make of it. The guy was pretty stupid for hitting a bear with a wooden spoon to save his dinner, but then when a bear tries to kill you you have to stop it. Now, if a hunter poked an endangered animal in the head until it snapped at him and then he said he could shoot it in self-defense, thats' obviously ridiculous, but some stupid guy who decided to try and drive off a bear by being annoying then won the fight throgh luck obviously didn't really intend to kill the bear.

The Animal Rights group clearly is overreacting, but at the same time that guy is @#%$ing stupid. Really. Its' a bear.
Posts: 4025
  • Posted On: May 30 2004 11:43pm
And who says the bear wouldn't have gone after the guy anyways after the bear finished the Salmon?
Posts: 4291
  • Posted On: May 30 2004 11:44pm
Actually Kraken, most people would just head for the door while the bear is eating the salmon, not just wait for him to finish and move on to bigger meals.
Posts: 2440
  • Posted On: May 30 2004 11:46pm
Because bears don't attack people when people leave them alone. He was after some fish.

You people have to understand that only humans kill pointlessly. Animals kills for food. Bears don't eat humans.
Posts: 4025
  • Posted On: May 31 2004 2:25am
Actually, Lions sometime kill pointlessley.
Posts: 2440
  • Posted On: May 31 2004 4:03am
They most likely don't, and even if so, are lions bears?
Posts: 7745
  • Posted On: May 31 2004 4:05am
I think the ARAW can choke. Make a rug out of the bear.